I have one daughter… just one, and truth be told that is all I need. She is a gem!!
When you have chronic health issues your whole family gets to journey with you. I say “gets to” but really, it isn’t a choice, for them, and it certainly wasn’t my choice. All my kids have, I am sure, been traumatized and impacted by having a mom who was so disabled in so many little ways.
Alyssa was very young when she was already helping out in the house.. not because she was old enough and ready, but because she was “available and because I needed the help”. Really, when I look back, I am not certain that she did things earlier then she should have, but the truth is.. that wasn’t the goal. We did not get to make the choice of “our children should be learning these house hold chores at this age” or “so and so” is ready to learn this now. Our choice was more reflected by… I can’t fold all the laundry without my hands swelling… so child “A” can do this, and child “B” can do this… and so on.
God blessed me richly with a super smart little girl who liked learning new things. But He also blessed me with a child that grew into an adult, who still chose to help… and who I could call on in a crisis. 
The swelling this time was just above the knee. During one part of my journey, I developed an odd and very scary symptom. I would suddenly, and without warning, flush from head to toe. It would develop for about an hour or so… and by the end of the hour, I looked like I had a head to toe sunburn, although it would start with a few speckles of red. This “flush” was not just a colour… there were also areas that would swell, and the sheer heat of the “burn” was very uncomfortable. And after a few of these attacks, Rob and I started to notice some breathing issues. The worst part is that somehow this also put me in a fog… my brain would shut down… and I honestly did not always remember what to do.While the doctor started testing (a process that lasted well over 2 years and eventually yielded zero answers, Alyssa helped me develop an Essential Oils protocol to help manage the symptoms for the duration of the “attack”. On one occasion, she walked my husband through the process while chatting to us calmly over the phone. And on more than one occasion, she packed kids up, and drove over immediately to sit with me and just make sure that I was safe, until my husband could come home, or until it was safe for her to leave. 
The three of us at an event together.
The three of us at an event together. There are so many layers to my journey with crazy symptoms… from pain and fatigue to severe brain fog. There were just no answers within the health care system… and I had to find ways to heal on my own. It took a lot of years, a lot of help and team of family, friends and practitioners. It was a lot of trial and error but with a great team I made it! And I am so grateful!
Are you on a hard or crazy journey? One without easy answers? Are you struggling with things?
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Journey...
Unfinished...
I love the simplicity of these two words, blended together. I love the idea that we are all on a journey, but also the idea that it isn’t complete or polished. We have not yet arrived and that there is still more to go. There is room for growth, there is room for change… there is even room for a complete reversal of direction!! Also, that it isn’t always easy and there might be hurdles along the way.
Hope...
To me, it means that things can always improve. For so many years my health spiralled down into pain and exhaustion and then I found new ways to first, cope and manage, and then to improve. And since I started taking those first steps in a different direction, my life slowly has changed and even has radically changed in some areas. At the core, many of my values are the same, and many of my struggles still are in the same area… but I have grown through many things, I have moved forward on this journey… and I have learned so much.
Encouragement...
I know that I am in one spot in this day, and at this time, however, I can look back at the past, and see all the steps that I have taken, and it slowly becomes my guide for the future. Every time I took a small positive step, there have been results. Some were small. Some were incredibly small and even hard to notice, but they are still there. And some were huge, and life changing. So as I look forward, and find one more thing to change, I am encouraged that there will be a result, and that the result will be good.
The other thing, that I love about this phrase, is that it applies to so many different facets of my life...
Just as I am not in the same place with my chronic health struggles, pain and fatigue, I am also not in the same place in so many areas of my life… everything from emotional, mental and spiritual to even financial and physical. It doesn’t seem to matter which area of my life I plan to address today, I know that there is going to be a positive result down the road.
My future journey-I think about this a lot these days...
I am already in my early 50s, and an empty nester. And I still have so many things I want to accomplish, and so many things I want to see.
I am not done yet!!
I am barely started, because I am on a Journey…
and it is indeed...
UNFINISHED!
Are you on a journey? Are you struggling with pain and exhaustion?
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